September 15

Love asks the question as to just how much one should endure at the hands of the beloved. Of course, physical abuse is intolerable at any level. If a relationship involves any kind of violent or excessively assertive physical action, it is highly questionable that there is any love in the relationship at all.

But there is certainly a reasonable amount of ‘give and take’ that should be expected whenever people interact on a level that can include the term ‘love.’ What should that exchange include? How much of another person’s failure can be considered reasonable and have the relationship survive?

Keep in mind that all relationships do not allow selectivity—you can’t pick your parents or your siblings—but you can certainly be choosy about your friends and romantic interests. Where choices are viable and reasonable, they must be exercised wisely. The Word tells us that “Love bears all things, believes all things, endures all things, hopes all things and that it never fails” I Corinthians 13:5-8. This is a standard far above that set by the world.

In other words, love that springs from God’s heart will fulfill His lofty expectation, for this is exactly how He loves us. When we enter a relationship, then, and as we observe the one with whom we’re interacting, how much of these godly attributes do we see in our love? Is it mutually tolerant and trusting and hopeful? Is it consistently unfaltering? If so, it is worth developing as a lifetime commitment. If not, let it go before leaving it becomes virtually impossible.